Alexandria Online


Sunday, September 21, 2014

The Devil Needs a Database

In this sentence from Annie Proulx's short story, "I've Always Loved This Place," the devil complains because he has no idea whether the famous painter Signorelli, who did such a lovely job painting The Last Judgment, resides in Hell or not:

"They had to start compiling a database of the damned and their particular niches; it was impossible to find anyone in Hell."

Even the devil, whose very mojo is chaos, needs a database.

But I think the devil, or perhaps Proulx, has it wrong. What the devil really needs is a couple of good Cisco certified internet engineers who can give him the kind of bandwidth and rock-solid wifi that the blessed would enjoy in heaven. That way he can google Signorelli and anyone else he's trying to find in hell.

But good luck finding a top notch network guy in hell. All the ones I've worked with are obviously going to heaven for all their good deeds.

1 comment:

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